澳洲Australia property Dealing with a Partner that has a differe


在澳大利亚 The pool at of an IP needs to be resurfaced (or so the pool doctor says), the cost was estimated to be $10K ($10,000), after recoverying from my impresssion of a cat coughing up a fur ball, it just seems far too much. Its just a standard poo I need some advice regarding a property purchase. Property - semi-detached house Bedrooms - 2 Condition - average needs internal reno to modernise Street - one of the best in suburb Location - excellent Close to schools - yes Transport - 50m


Hi all, this is my first post after trawling this great forum for a number of months.

I'm curious to know if Investors with a Partner/Spouse share the same apetite for risk that they have?

As background, the lights switched on for me only a few years ago after the birth of our first child when I realised our family's future wouldn't be so rosy the way we were going. My answer was budget and invest asap (probably high risk / high return) but my Wife had other ideas. I'm thankful to her really as 3 yrs later at 36, we owe $150k on our PPOR (valued @ $460k), have built up a $50k emergency buffer and are waiting on council to approve our first small IP build (albeit a little later then I'd prefer).

I am more of a moderate-high risk taker and my Wife is risk averse so negotiating the investment middle ground is tricky? Anyone else in a similar situation and how do you accommodate each other's point of view to move forward?  

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My wife and I have very different appetite for risk - I have much more of the gambler streak in me.

Having said that - how have you and your partner identified and assessed risk?

For instance, what is it that your wife finds risky?
What risk mitigations have you got in place for those risks identified by her?

On the other hand, her idea of "safe" (eg cash in bank) may have its own associated set of risks.

The Y-man  

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Hi Y-Man

We've discussed in length and it's seems to be mostly the idea of getting into more debt and the 'what-ifs'. To mitigate the risk we've lowered our non-deductible debt, saved some cash for a rainy day and are building a small IP that should be cost neutral (after deductions) at the start. Baby steps but I feel she'll get more confident the more we get closer to our goals.

I take your point about cash in the bank having its own risk but it's her SANF and at least it's sitting in an offset account against our PPOR.  

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jabz said: ↑
I'm curious to know if Investors with a Partner/Spouse share the same apetite for risk that they have?Click to expand...
Thankfully, yes. We've both been fairly aggressive with our investing and share the same risk profile. Just the other day I was at an open house for a potential IP which I thought would be a good purchase- I called wifey to let her know, her response was "buy it" :)

At the end of the day, you only have one life, might as well have a crack.

Cheers

Jamie  

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amazing posts on this subject, we have had this issue "like" forever, we now relise that we need our eggs in other baskets , so the risk is now less as we shal chase the IP thing as other will be paying 90% of the debt , so this becomes LESS risk.  

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It would be our biggest difference.

Most people would call me a risk taker, but I feel after quite a few lessons learnt and honing one's technique, the risks become manageable.

My wife is very risk adverse and so her SANF is non-existent.  

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I have always been happy to take risks but have always been comforted that if all turns to custard, we could sell everything and at least have enough buffer that we have somewhere to live. I wonder if your wife would be happy if your PPOR was in her name and any investing was in your name. Of course, that might not suit you tax-wise but just my first thought.

If something goes wrong, then at least your house would (should?) be safe and that might be enough to help her to sleep at night.  

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Us too. I was always the bigger risk taker and way more interested in investing than hubby but over the years as he started to see the results he came on board much more. Eventually we got to the point that he would come home and I would say " I bought another house today" and he would just say "great, where do I sign?".

Now 11 years down the track we are on the same page risk wise.  

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I would have to say I am the aggressive one.Everytime I look at a property I immediately think about how I would finance it,market the property as a rental or "rent to own".Either unfurnished or furnished all inclusive.
Rob and I are a team.
My job is to find them, he makes sure they are structurally sound, or what types of repairs need to be made.
As long as we can buy at least one property each year, I can settle for that. (would prefer 3 each year)

We never second guess a purchase.
If it was good when we bought it,it is still good even if a few issues come up.

I never have an issue with SANF.  

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thanks for the replies, it's good to know that despite some differences, investment continues and you flourish over time

I have hope that as we continue diversifying and building our investments by starting small that she'll grow more confident and take on more risk as time goes by. Better to be in the game than out of it completely.  

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jabz said: ↑
Hi all, this is my first post after trawling this great forum for a number of months.

I'm curious to know if Investors with a Partner/Spouse share the same apetite for risk that they have?

...
I am more of a moderate-high risk taker and my Wife is risk averse so negotiating the investment middle ground is tricky? Anyone else in a similar situation and how do you accommodate each other's point of view to move forward?Click to expand...
Yes, this a good point to make and a reasonably common situation , i should think. We have the same issue- i loke to borrow money ( and thus go into debt) to put on investments that appreciate in time ( whilst living in debt till i sell those investments).
My partner is the opposite: so risk averse ( especially when it comes to money), her strategy is just one step above putting $ under the pillow every night.
At first, it drove me crazy. How could anyone be so afraid of a mortgage? Yep, there are people out there who paint debt as a 4 letter word ( and mostly, it is) and apply it broadly to all situations in life.

I have heard that there is good debt and bad debt. Good debt is one where you go into debt for an asset that appreciates faster than the interest on the debt. Example, a wise purchase on real-estate or shares. Note the word 'wise'.

Bad debt is the opposite, and applies to most other forms of debt ( credit cards, personal loans etc).

Try to explain this to your partner that not all forms of debt are bad and that you are focussing on the good debt only whilst minimising the bad debt.

In the rare case, you partner might actually work with you: you take the risks, and he/she bails you out during the bad times and share in the spoils during the good times :D ..try making that case..you might find yourself rent-free on the park bench if you know what i mean..:D  

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jabz said: ↑
Hi all, this is my first post after trawling this great forum for a number of months.

(Welcome Jabz, btw)

I'm curious to know if Investors with a Partner/Spouse share the same appetite for risk that they have?

We are very different people, right down to the 'risk adverse' component of our makeup. I'm ideas/researcher/footwork soldier/networker/scan the horizon/talk to people/deal maker/learn, learn, learn/negotiator...my nature is I don't have fear or a real risk aversion in the investment sense because I am rather meticulous in what I learn about what/where I am investing. I did the same thing with my partner, if he was going to be part of my life, my world, my intimate life he was researched by me also, I wanted to know what sort of person he was, his values, morals, sense of responsibility, kindness, compassion..I am a researcher by nature, that applies to most things in my life, whether they be investing and/or people, 'stuff'. So I knew when I went into our relationship/investing I had my eyes wide open.

I am more of a moderate-high risk taker and my Wife is risk averse so negotiating the investment middle ground is tricky? Anyone else in a similar situation and how do you accommodate each other's point of view to move forward?Click to expand...
Mr OO basically has my research presented before him, he sort of cannot fault it, mostly I am a free reign investor, and I do like to talk to him about some things I am thinking over, he sometimes has an important contribution to make, plus his management skills are second to none.

We get on fine if I fly my own ship and he does not attempt to manage the unmanageable (me). He, I guess, has taken somewhat of a leap of faith in me, his mind is very structured, he prefers order and likes to control many things but he does not control me, nor the investing, yet gets to reap the benefits from it. Our greatest difficulty in communication is my innate abstract/concept/ideas/vision/stategy vs his natural style of concrete/earthy/short/concise/yesterday was better.. that is the greatest comprising I have to do, I am able to learn and develop that communication he needs/wants, as he finds it almost impossible to think abstractly, while I can straddle both. So risk/fear is no difficulty or enemy, only our brain hardwiring...My greatest challenge has been learning to be bilingual and translate to him 'what this all means'.
 

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Thanks for the welcome, it's been amazing to see how the dynamics work between seasoned investors and their other halves and that you're willing to give a newbie advice. I've definitely learnt a great deal already.

:) It's ironic but she/we come from an Accounting background so good debt and deductibility is not a new concept (which may be why she's so focussed on the bad debt). Might be best to crunch some numbers (with and without IPs).  

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Jabz, interesting that you say your wife is risk averse but you're just about to build your first IP. Count yourself lucky that she isn't really risk averse, you sure won the battle negotiating the middle ground.

Wish you well for the build, it never goes to plan. Just got tennants into our new place last month, was glad to be finished that project as the builders just take forever.

Gools  

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Gools said: ↑
Jabz, interesting that you say your wife is risk averse but you're just about to build your first IP.Click to expand...
Good point - Jabz's wife must be less risk averse than me, because I would never do a build for a first IP... too scared.....

The Y-man  

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believe me it took a while to even get started thinking about IPs, although I'm not sure now if I've made a newbie mistake by building an IP?  

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jabz said: ↑
believe me it took a while to even get started thinking about IPs, although I'm not sure now if I've made a newbie mistake by building an IP?Click to expand...
Only if it doesn't work out!!! :D Otherwise, you're a genius!! :)  

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Great thread,

I was thinking the other day thank god that everyone is different! Im the "thrill of the chase" love to crunch the numbers and find the deal of the century but then suffer from buyers remorse as soon as the deal is accepted.

Hubby hates home opens and just wants to be given facts/figures/reasons why this is a good idea. Once the figures adds up just signs to the deals and then talks me out of buyers remorse.

In the beginning he didnt want to buy any IPs at all. He kept saying I just want to live, what happens if we die tommorrow, this drove me absolutely crazy....I just had to find a differnent way to convince him of a great deal. Now we talk in slabs/cases of beers.

"hon ive seen a great deal its only a case of beer a week to hold"
response is usually "if you get it to a six pack and I'lll sign"...Unbeliveable!!..by the way my husband is not allowed to go to Dan Murphys by himself.."Thats 2 properties worth" is my usual complaint.  

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sammmeee said: ↑
....I just had to find a differnent way to convince him of a great deal. Now we talk in slabs/cases of beers.

"hon ive seen a great deal its only a case of beer a week to hold"
response is usually "if you get it to a six pack and I'lll sign"...Unbeliveable!!..by the way my husband is not allowed to go to Dan Murphys by himself.."Thats 2 properties worth" is my usual complaint.Click to expand...

Nice thought sammmeee.....when you really get cracking in this game, you might even get to the point where you are looking at purchasing a Dan Murphy - that is, the simple box a Dan Murphy operates out of.....at that stage you'll be able to let your husband wander in there as the Landlord all the time.


There are two for sale right now, both in NSW, both with brand spankin' new 15 year Leases.


Don't take too long phaffing about with 3x1's....there's some good strong stuff to be had.  

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You might find that you both have the same risk profile, but are simply viewing the circumstances differently.

You see the risk as not having enough money in the future, and not being financially protected. As you and I both see it, this is risk AVERSE because doing nothing would be a bigger risk as you'd be at the mercy of your employer or something happening to your house.

However your wife sees this as risk TAKING because of extra debt, responsibilities and the things that can go wrong with an IP.

So what I suggest is you demonstrate how further investing is actually a risk averse strategy, and doing nothing is a bigger risk. You will not encourage her to be a higher risk taker because people don't generally change. So show her how an IP fits her risk profile. Show her vacancy rates, growth rates, supply and demand figures, and so on.  

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