澳洲Australia property Funny agent ads | Sydney


在澳大利亚 The pool at of an IP needs to be resurfaced (or so the pool doctor says), the cost was estimated to be $10K ($10,000), after recoverying from my impresssion of a cat coughing up a fur ball, it just seems far too much. Its just a standard poo I need some advice regarding a property purchase. Property - semi-detached house Bedrooms - 2 Condition - average needs internal reno to modernise Street - one of the best in suburb Location - excellent Close to schools - yes Transport - 50m


Sometimes half the blurb about a property for sale is selling the agent to prospective vendors rather than selling the property to prospective buyers.

And sometimes this appears to be an automated process, with no one checking that the first bit makes sense with the last bit before hitting SEND.

Here's an example (identifying information deleted as I'm investigating this one myself!)

Extensive Renovation Required (with pics)

$XX,000 Well positioned less than a five minute walk to the XXXXX Train Station and main street. Requires extensive work including outstanding council orders. This is a rare challenge but has been priced accordingly.

This fine property is one of XXX properties we currently have for sale or coming up soon. To find out details of our full range call XXXX XXXX 24 hours. Don’t buy a home until you see our exclusive range.Click to expand...
How can a council condemned property be considered a 'fine property'?!

Peter  

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Yeah that's a beauty.

I'll tell you some thing that I find amusing, and may be you could look at your local news papers to see how wide spread it is.

Have a look at some of the photographs that have the front door as square. It seems that many of them extend the size of the photo to make the building look bigger than it really is. I've seen some photos stretched so much the front door is almost rectangle, but the wrong way.:eek:  

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Spiderman said:
How can a council condemned property be considered a 'fine property'?!

PeterClick to expand...
Possibly the 'outstanding council orders' may only be a matter of work previosly done on the property without council authourisation, which may need signing off.

Regards
Marty  

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The Wild One said:
Yeah that's a beauty.

I'll tell you some thing that I find amusing, and may be you could look at your local news papers to see how wide spread it is.

Have a look at some of the photographs that have the front door as square. It seems that many of them extend the size of the photo to make the building look bigger than it really is. I've seen some photos stretched so much the front door is almost rectangle, but the wrong way.:eek:Click to expand...
That is too funny! Love it...

I haven't seen dodgy doors but I have seen pix on domain that have the colour fiddled with so the usually grey or muddy brown Parramatta River looks aegean blue.... rest of the photo looks mighty weird though.... scamin' it.  

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kissfan said:
Possibly the 'outstanding council orders' may only be a matter of work previosly done on the property without council authourisation, which may need signing off.Click to expand...
I made investigations today, and it's rather more serious.

The rotting animal corpses, urine-soaked bedding and excrement throughout are just the start (and by no means the worst)!

Peter  

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but if the property is in a great location .... :D ... could be the best deal you've ever made  

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lizzie said:
but if the property is in a great location .... :D ... could be the best deal you've ever madeClick to expand...
Not if there are building issues, and it's part of a strata-titled group, so you can't just knock down your bit and redevelop/sell the land.

Peter  

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Spiderman said:
I made investigations today, and it's rather more serious.

The rotting animal corpses, urine-soaked bedding and excrement throughout are just the start (and by no means the worst)!

PeterClick to expand...
Hi Peter

What you have mentioned would turn a lot of people off which may work in your favour (if you are still interested). Providing the place is structurally sound all of the 'surface mess' could be cleaned/taken away for a price.

Obviously depends on the extent of work involved, but if the place can be bought for the right price..............

Regards
Marty  

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kissfan said:
Hi Peter

What you have mentioned would turn a lot of people off which may work in your favour (if you are still interested). Providing the place is structurally sound all of the 'surface mess' could be cleaned/taken away for a price.Click to expand...
Yep. Apparently it also needs a fair amount of building work that experienced people have shied away from.

A silly offer might be 'land value' which would be around 30-50% of the already-cheap asking price (being a unit in an area with low land values). This would leave a large margin for remedial works. But after all that you could have spent 2 or even 3 times the land value on the whole project.

Also this could be considered risky given that there are perfectly sound houses in the area that sell for only 130-150% of land value and you've got much more flexibility with what you can do on the land.

Peter  

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Anyone up for a swim? :cool:

http://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-qld-coorparoo-107316455  

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I recently know of an agency which was taken to the media over an advert that read:

Deceased Estate! Owners are dying to sell.

It wasnt deceased estate, just reiterating the vendor really wanted to sell, and they got done for poor taste.

Pretty funny tounge in cheek catch phrase and better then any call "000 this is a steal" type ads.  

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My all time favourite funny ad was for a property up in the Adelaide Hills. The property had a couple of fenced off paddocks.

Now not sure if a letter was missing or they got two letters around the wrong way but they had the usual blurb about the nice house etc and finished with 'bring the hores'..........  

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The Wild One said: ↑
Yeah that's a beauty.

I'll tell you some thing that I find amusing, and may be you could look at your local news papers to see how wide spread it is.

Have a look at some of the photographs that have the front door as square. It seems that many of them extend the size of the photo to make the building look bigger than it really is. I've seen some photos stretched so much the front door is almost rectangle, but the wrong way.:eek:Click to expand...
I always thought they were houses for larger people??  

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We once advertised a very large house for sale and the agent wrote on the sign:

YES SIZE DOES MATTER.

I only saw it when I was helping out with an inspection on the weekend and just couldn't stop laughing during the inspection time.  

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Work out how much you'd pay for the property if it had the same issues but was clean. Get a quote for cleaning. Add 50% to the quote. Deduct this value from your target price.

Start negotiating.

These sort of properties are gold. As a potential purchaser you have good leverage and no downside. If the deal doesn't go where you want it to, walk away.  

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