澳洲英文小品文

在澳大利亚英语学习




贴个我收藏的英文小品文,供大家欣赏。(也为了早点贴上我可爱的熊猫宝宝)

Here's something to lighten up your day

MANAGEMENT LESSONS #01
A crow was  sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him,  "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day  long?"
The crow answered: "Sure, why not!" So, the rabbit  sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.
All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped  on the  rabbit and ate
it..........

Management Lesson  Learnt :
To be sitting and doing  nothing, you must be sitting up there, very, very high up.

MANAGEMENT LESSONS #02

A turkey was chatting with a  bull.

"I would love to be able to get to the top of that  tree," sighed  the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy.

"Well, why don't you  nibble on some of my droppings?"replied the bull.

"They're packed  with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found  that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branchof the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally, after a fortnight, there he was, -  proudly perched at the top of the tree.  But, all too soon he was  promptly spotted by a farmer,who shot the turkey out of the  tree........

Management Lesson  Learnt ::
Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

MANAGEMENT LESSONS #03

When the body was first made, all  the parts wanted to be the Boss.

The brain said, "I should be Boss  because I control the whole body's responses and functions."

The 2 feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry thebrain about and get him to wherever he wants to go."

The 2 hands said, "We  should be the Boss becausewe do all the work and earn all the money  we could"

And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs andthe eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.

All the parts laughed at the idea of  the assholebeing the Boss.

So the asshole decided to go on a  strike, blockeditself up and refused to work......

Within a short  time the eyes became crossed, thehands clenched, the feet twitched,  the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.

Eventually they all decided that the asshole shouldbe the Boss.

And so the motion was passed.

All  the other parts did all the work,  while the Boss just sat and passed out  the shit!

Management Lesson  Learnt ::
You don't need brains to be a  Boss - any asshole will do.

MANAGEMENT LESSONS #04

A little  bird was flying south for the winter.

It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field.

While it was lying there, a cow came by  and dropped some dung on it.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.

The dung was actually thawing him out!

So, he lay there all, warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird  singing and came to investigate.

Following the sound the  cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him up.......!

Management Lesson  Learnt ::
(1) Not  everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your  friend.
(3) And especially when you're  in deep shit, keep your big,fat mouth shut!



[ Last edited by horseanddragon on 2005-1-2 at 07:51 PM ]

评论
很好啊,哪里可以看到更多啊
澳洲中文论坛热点
悉尼部份城铁将封闭一年,华人区受影响!只能乘巴士(组图)
据《逐日电讯报》报导,从明年年中开始,因为从Bankstown和Sydenham的城铁将因Metro South West革新名目而
联邦政客们具有多少房产?
据本月早些时分报导,绿党副首领、参议员Mehreen Faruqi已获准在Port Macquarie联系其房产并建造三栋投资联

英语学习

英语学习

约翰逊辞职演说 -

澳大利亚英国前首相Boris Johnson辞职演说中提到了这个短语 -- them's the breaks 通常正式场合是不太使用这样非正式的用语 根据Linguaholic的解释,这个短语通常用在 Something unfair or unpleasant happens and ...

英语学习

notice boards: always look on the bright side of life

澳大利亚1\always look on the bright side of life 乐观生活 2\fire exit , do not obstruct 消防通道,不要阻塞; 3\footpath under construction 行人道正在兴建 4\private property pedestrian traffic is welcome at own risk 私人物业欢迎 ...

英语学习

错过了一个亿,英语怎么表达?

澳大利亚以前老外调侃过类似的表达,大概是错过了免费的冰淇淋,感觉错过了一个亿 但不记得他们怎么说了 评论 Lost a fortune 评论 一般要么是lost a million或lost a billion,反正不会说lost 100 milli ...

英语学习

请问 找老板报销 怎么说?

澳大利亚就例如用自己的钱给公司买了些东西,跟老板怎么说报销呢? 谢谢! 评论 expense? 评论 马泥马泥 评论 Reimbursement of miscellaneous items 评论 reimbursement or expense 比如: Can I reimburse my expens ...

英语学习

小白学习英语的好方法

澳大利亚新概念英语1-4册是火了20年的教材,经久不衰,app store下载软件,每天跟读,也就是shadow,纠正自己的发音,这是很好的学习方法 评论 如果你在学第一册和第二册,可以用这套教材。如 ...

英语学习

英语求助

澳大利亚一个同事要请假,发了下面这段话,”if the water and flooding levels drop here in SA I want to go away at this time so thought I’d book now” 这里他说的是洪水到了南澳的意思,还是说洪水水位下降的意思 ...

英语学习

学英语贵在坚持

澳大利亚但是坚持是最难的 评论 有兴趣就不难了 评论 持之以恒,定能成功。 加油 评论 you are right.Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. 评论 Yes,Persistence is hardest 评论 学英语贵不在坚持。 ...

英语学习

英文的书引号怎么写?

澳大利亚The title of the book is 1001 nights. 可不可以? 评论 书引号? 书名号? 双引号? 可以不加双引号, The title of the book is 1001 nights. 评论 觉得更好的方式可能是搜key words: how to quote a book [name] 当然简单 ...

英语学习

问一个英语问题,请指教

澳大利亚Condition:The student is not a patient of the GP. 我女儿 在 三年前是病人,但是不去看了。算不算仍是那个GP的病人。 The student was a patient of the GP. The student is no longer a patient of the GP 评论 一定要找 ...

英语学习

一个英语新闻的阅读理解

澳大利亚在另一个帖里,有人说打了疫苗比不打疫苗更容易感染新的omicron变种。他引用了这则新闻。我读到的意思是新变种比旧变种更容易感染打过疫苗的人。 “It appears to have same intrinsic tran ...

英语学习

请问这句话如何理解?很困惑。。。

澳大利亚address as recorded on the electoral roll for the past 12 months 理解1:在过去12个月地址必须都在选民名册上,意思是这个地址在选民名册上要有12个月之久 理解2:在过去12个月选民名册上有这个地址 ...

英语学习

请问tafe的英语课程怎么报,收费吗

澳大利亚刚来澳洲,很想学习英语,但是不知道tafe的英语怎么报名,费用多少,谁知道麻烦告知一下 评论 要看你是什么签证。不过任何给移民的英语课程就是一个入门课程而已。这个国家没有 ...